As did the apostles, at times, we too find ourselves pondering whether many (or who) shall be “saved”. In this respect, the theme of salvation may sometimes make us feel on-edge and even confused. The question is: do we really have enough reason to feel this way? More specifically, what does it really mean to be saved?
It is indeed terrifying to imagine a reality which is completely cut off from God’s love. Such is a reality where despair is never satiated – love ceases to exist. It is a reality in which our humanity is debased, and we stop doing what we are created to do – to love. All this is to say that, whenever we speak of salvation, we must always keep in mind our happiness and flourishing. In this respect, if we reflect further on this week’s Gospel, we discover that being “saved” isn’t so much about achieving something – it is more about growing and receiving. As the “Angelic Doctor” (Saint Thomas Aquinas) tells us, the virtues of faith and charity are a “gift”. And precisely, it is because God gifts himself to us all, that Christ warns the apostles that “many will attempt to enter but will not be strong enough”. God’s salvation isn’t primarily received on merits of strength and mere self-effort. We cannot buy God’s unconditional love – in truth, His love does not need to be bought, because it is already given to us freely and always. The ultimate task, therefore, is to “receive it”. That’s what we do with gifts, after all! But how do we receive God? This is where Christ’s final words come in. Christ says, “some are last who will be first, and some are first who will be last”. Essentially, what Christ is hinting at here is “humility”. His point is that self-flourishing – personal union with God (salvation) – is not primarily the result of self-creation (of our egoic capacity to be in control) – rather, it is the result of being open to humbly receiving. It is about putting down our guard, accepting our flaws, and being open to God’s healing. It is about realising that we don’t know our way around – that we’re on a journey, trying to grow, trying to find joy – and don’t fully know the ropes. Indeed, it takes a great deal of humility for one to say: I need you, O Lord.
Very often, who’s “first” isn’t always truly first. The world may well portray certain feats and ways of life as being most valuable – and yet, amidst all this, with great love, Christ reminds us that what we truly and primarily need, to both grow and find joy, is to be always one with Him – something which only the truly humble – those “sometimes last” – can receive.
Let us not strive for the rewards of heaven, valuable though they may be, but live so as to please the God of heaven. If God were not in heaven, all its beauty, riches, and sweetness would be dull rather than delightful. By faith, we know God already dwells within us. But in heaven we will see God face to face. May we so live that one day we will be in heaven praising and playing eternally before our Lord and Saviour! – St. Jean De Chantal